DEFINING YOUR PATH
How to Pursue What You Love Without Being Derailed
EPISODE 037 | APPLE PODCASTS | SPOTIFY
I recently had an experience that really got me thinking deeply about the direction of our lives and careers. I was having dinner with a friend, knowing how often I add new ideas and concepts to our business and being open to evolve when it’s needed, she asked me, "So, what's next for you?" This question isn't unusual, but it struck a chord this time. It got me thinking, not just my next focus, but on how essential it is to make sure that 'what’s next' aligns profoundly with my overall vision for life and work.
This reflection started the idea for this episode, the importance of defining and pursuing your own vision to ensure you live a life that’s true to yourself. So often, we get caught up in the motions, following paths that might not truly resonate with who we are or what we desire most deeply.
In this episode we'll explore how to identify whether you’re on the path that’s right for you, how to realign if you’re not, and how to protect what you most would love to achieve from anything—or anyone—that might try to derail you.
We’re looking at why it’s so important to create your own direction and how doing so can prevent any kind of regrets. Whether you're feeling uncertain about your current business, thinking about a shift, or just need a little inspiration to reaffirm you're on the right track, this episode is for you.
Reflecting on Where You Are
I'd love you to take a moment—a real pause—to reflect on where you are right now in your life and business? It's so easy to get caught up in the day-to-day that we rarely take the time to genuinely assess where we are.
Ask yourself: Are you truly happy with where you are? Does your current role and business fill you with excitement and genuine happiness at the end of each day? Or is there a nagging feeling that something isn't quite right, that maybe there’s something more out there for you? Perhaps there’s a dream you’ve put on hold or a passion you’ve sidelined for 'practical' reasons.
It takes a considerable amount of courage to question the status quo, especially if it involves stepping away from a seemingly secure job, current business strategy or a clear expectation of yourself. But, embracing potential changes can be incredibly empowering. It’s about asking yourself not only where you want to go but also why you want to go there. What drives you? What makes you feel alive and valued?
Thinking about these questions isn't just about making big leaps or dramatic business changes; sometimes, it's about making small adjustments that realign your day-to-day with your long-term vision. It’s about ensuring that every step you take is a step towards a life that feels fulfilling and true to who you are.
“Let’s take a moment to explore these ideas and think about what it means to live a life that’s truly aligned with our deepest values and aspirations, and the steps we can take to quite bravely move towards that reality.”
Living a Life True to Yourself
As you think about your own path, consider what changes, big or small, might lead you closer to a life that feels genuinely yours. What steps can you take today, this week, or this year to start moving in that direction? Remember, living true to yourself isn't just about major leaps; it's also about the small, everyday decisions that gradually shape our lives into expressions of our true selves.
I’ve looked at this idea in a previous episode, episode 019, Living Authentically and Boldly, and often when we look to potentially change, we encounter a barrage of societal expectations and external opinions that can significantly influence our decisions. These external voices can come from anywhere—family, friends, media, and the ingrained societal norms that subtly dictate what success should look like. It's so important that we recognise that while well-meaning, these influences can sometimes lead us away from our true paths and into lives that don't fully reflect who we are or what we desire most deeply.
The first step in overcoming these preconceived notions is to identify them. It's about becoming aware of the "shoulds" that populate our thoughts. These are often the beliefs that tell us we should pursue certain careers, live in certain ways, or even avoid pursuing our true interests because they don't fit a conventional mould of success. Ask yourself: Are these beliefs genuinely mine, or are they inherited from external sources or have I subconsciously put these boundaries there myself? Reflect on whether these notions truly align with your personal values and long-term happiness.
Once we've identified these limiting beliefs, the next step is letting them go. This can be challenging, as it often involves unlearning deep-seated ideas about what our lives are supposed to look like. One effective way to begin this process is through affirmation and visualisation—actively imagining your life as you wish it to be, free from external constraints, and affirming your right to pursue this vision. Frequently engaging in this practice can help you decide your own ideas and goals, making it easier to move toward them.
Additionally, being open to change is essential. Everything around us is continually evolving, and staying steadfast to our plans can sometimes mean missing out on opportunities that could lead to real happiness and success, whatever that looks like for you. I believe it’s so healthy to remain flexible and open to new opportunities, particularly those that resonate with you deeply. This isn't about aimlessly jumping on every new possibility but about thoughtfully considering how these opportunities work for you and align with your goals.
“Finally, seize those opportunities when they come. This means not only recognising when a chance aligns with what you most want, but also having the courage to pursue it. Every step you take towards a passion, no matter how small that step might be, is a definite move away from the inertia of preconceived paths and toward a more authentic and fulfilling life.”
Creating Your Own Destiny
If you watched and remember the film "Sliding Doors," it looked at how life's outcomes can dramatically change based on seemingly tiny moments of choice. Gwyneth Paltrow's character lives out two parallel lives based on whether or not she catches a London underground tube. It beautifully illustrates a message: our destinies are shaped by our actions, not predetermined by fate.
This concept of creating your own destiny underscores the importance of being proactive—of making decisions that actively shape our future rather than passively waiting for opportunities to come knocking on our door. Every choice we make, every action we take, opens new doors and influences the paths our lives will take.
To help us with these choices, it’s important to tune into our intuition. Our intuition often helps us through decisions that might not always seem logical but feel right. It can be the key to making choices that align deeply with what success means and looks like for us. It helps us understand which opportunities are worth pursuing and will likely lead us toward fulfilling our true potential.
These are some steps that I use that I hope will also help you:
Keep open to new potential opportunities and trust in your ability to make decisions. Think back to past decisions that have led to successful outcomes. Absolutely learn from your different experiences and look to remain adaptable in your approaches. Sometimes, what we initially perceive as failures are simply stepping stones to something wholly positive. And listen to your inner voice. When we are surrounded by advice, learning to listen to your own voice is often where you will find the exact answer you need.
Start by setting clear, attainable goals that reflect what you truly want. Create a detailed action plan with specific steps and test and trial. It’s important that you have clear goals and actions in place and take the time to gather feedback. Before you put extensive work into a new idea, test it first.
Behind the scenes, within my own business, before we moved forward with a pivot from teaching floristry into supporting small business owners, we created a masterclass called the Creative Business Masterclass. Along with truly helping our current audience with key elements within their business, it also gave us an opportunity to check there was definite demand, before we decided to pivot. The masterclass was a success and proved enormously helpful to those who joined us, and I loved every part of it. It was more closely aligned with my own vision that I had even first imagined, so it was a significant part of our final decision to move away from teaching floristry. It felt exciting. We had carefully tested to see what the reaction might be. And as a result we were able to forward calmly and confidently.
Stepping out of your comfort zone can absolutely be daunting, but it’s also hugely exciting and it's often necessary for growth. I was recently asked a brilliant question when I responded to someone who was brave enough to take on a project that made them feel hugely nervous. I replied to say how much I loved that they were willing to take on a project that was clearly out of their comfort zone and how happy I was that it had worked so well for them. In reply, someone else in the group asked why stepping out of your comfort zone was so important and I thought it was a fascinating question. She understood that it can lead to growth, but she was curious to understand more.
I thought about it carefully and replied that I feel all businesses must evolve to remain successful. Our world, customer desires and needs, styles, technology, communication etc. move at such a fast pace, that as a small business owner it’s so important to remain nimble and be open to change. And in doing so, often we will need to put ourselves in positions we haven’t encountered before, and inevitably that can often make us feel uncomfortable.
“So, to grow - and in fact even to remain at an existing level - it’s important that we are prepared and willing to feel out of our comfort zone.”
Even in a sector where the offerings may change little (period art collections etc.), everything around the products (what’s in trend, what’s not, how customers prefer to buy, what marketing messages they will most respond to etc.) will change.
SUMMARY
In summary, it’s not so much that the feeling is to be applauded, it’s what it symbolises.
So definitely take the time to try new things that align with your personal and professional goals, even if they're intimidating at first. Remember, growth and comfort rarely coexist, and the experiences that challenge us often reward us the most.
And then maintaining momentum and keeping high levels of motivation are so important once you've started to implement changes. Keep yourself motivated by frequently reviewing your goals and celebrating small victories along the way. Tools like planners or digital apps can be invaluable for tracking your progress and ensuring you remain focused on your end goals. And look for like-minded people who are also proactively pursuing what they most would love to achieve. Particularly on those down days, it’s incredible how like minded people can really pick you up and help you find your enthusiasm again, with fresh ideas and inspiration, and just simply their energy.
Having said all of that, setbacks are going to be an absolute inevitable part of this process. It definitely won’t always be easy, fun and days filled with excitement. So it’s important that you are ready for that, and when you come up against trickier days, view them instead as opportunities to learn and grow rather than obstacles. Seeing all the challenges that come your way in this light, will absolutely help you to embrace resilience and find solutions. It's not about avoiding setbacks but learning how to figure them out effectively.
As we come to the end, I hope you've found encouragement and practical insights to help. Whether you're at a crossroads, considering a major change, or simply looking to make a few refinements, the key is to remain true to yourself and know what it is you deeply want.
We've talked about the importance of assessing where you are in your life and business, and the necessity of realigning your actions with your long-term vision. We've also explored how to live authentically. And we've looked at the practical steps to identify and shed the preconceived notions and external pressures that can steer us away from what we truly want.
“Your journey is uniquely yours. It’s a path that will be fraught with challenges, that’s simply life and never more so than in managing and growing your business, but it’s also rich with potential for fulfilment and happiness. I never feel that it’s about the destination but instead every step that brings you closer to where you truly want to be. Each decision, each action, it’s a part of your life, contributing to a larger picture that only you can create.”
So take that step today—whether it's making a small change in how you approach your daily tasks or taking a giant leap into a huge pivot with your business. Keep your vision clear and your intentions true. Surround yourself with support, proactively look to keep your spirits high, and remember to reflect on and celebrate every win, even the smallest, along the way.
If today's discussion sparked something in you, if it made you think or reevaluate, or if you just want to share your thoughts, I’d love to hear from you. Share your stories, ask your questions, or suggest topics for future episodes. Your input really helps and we read every email and message we receive. You can send me a DM on Instagram or an email to news@philippacraddock.com .